The Worst time to go through your Worst time.

The Worst time to be going through your Worst time

Of all the times I spent depressed and locked in debilitating agonizing anxiety I would have to say it was the times when everyone else was at their happiest. Like holidays, sunny beach days, parties and the like.  Its not that we are bitter of your good happy happy time ( well maybe sometimes we are ) but most of the time its just a slap in the face of how miserable we are.  To see people walking on the beach and laughing at parties. To see people all excited about Christmas and a new car or new love while your dying inside -well its a pain like no other.  In fact I would have to say that on days when I was feeling a little OK it would be the site of someone doing something fun and happy that would actually trigger my emotional manure. It was like my mind would say to itself -"hey what are you feeling OK about, remember your a mess and your not as happy as them nor will you ever be". Wow talk about a slap in the face.   See people who don't know our walk and struggle they can never understand how it manifests itself.  I remember one time leaving for a family vacation and road trip. Everyone was happy excited and the car was filled with enthusiasm. All hoping dad would just be a normal dad. So there we were leaving the confines of Long Island NY USA and then quickly pulling over to the side of the road and me saying to my wife - I cant go any further.  We would then turn around that day and head back home. My mind sinking faster and faster into depression as I kept ruminating the thoughts of a life that would always be like this. Who would want to live like this all the time? Not me !

So whats the point , answer and way out for happy times for THEM while we are in a living nightmare ? Well the answer is never simple but in reality it is if we can just - hold on.  People allot of the life of a person like us is HOLDING ON one day more. See we must hold on one day more and not just for our own sanity but for all of those we love and who love us. Friends I can only tell you what is the answer for me and what is the answer for you - It is the answer we don't like or find hard to believe in. Its the answer that because of the Reality of a loving God who sees our pain and sorrow that ONE DAY it WILL pass . Really it will pass and you will smile again , smell the flowers, walk the dog, go on vacation /holiday, enjoy life , have fun, and look forward to things.  It will happen but you and I MUST hold on one more day. We must believe that GOD is real and will always be real. Dear friends on this Christmas 2018 be you alone or with many I give you the only gift that is worth anything. It is the gift of Christmas which is the gift of NEW LIFE for 2019. Your only job is to except it, believe it and want it more then life itself. So anyway with all of that said here is His gift to you.

So 2018 years ago a baby was born. A baby born to die. A baby born to die for you and I. A baby which was God come to earth for His creation. Come to earth to save us from ourselves and our biggest issue which was - not being able to feel God nor walk with Him because of a dirty little wall called sin. Our imperfections which would always leave us imperfect and separated and alone. See friends the coldness we feel is the coldness of being outside the loop of Gods light. So God knowing that we couldn't fix ourselves decided to fix the problem for us. So He offers you this gift. It cost nothing to us but everything to Him.  Its the gift of freedom, forgiveness, new life and one never to be alone again. So right where you are right now- PLEASE I beg you !  Please call out to God and ask Him to restore you to what you were made to be. Ask Him to forgive you and believe His love through His Son is the only thing you need. Want it and desire it and except it,  Believe that Jesus is GOD come to earth for You and I and decide to serve and live for Him this new year. Claim and call Him Lord and King and trust in Jesus dying for us and then rising for us !  Do this by faith not even seeing any proof or understanding how this all works. Just do it and wait for Him.  He will not let you down and will lead you down the path towards HIM.  

I did this one day and I am here and alive ONLY because of Him. Please except this gift. Not of religion or lies but of truth and Hope.  It is REAL !!!! Don't follow the lies of this world anymore follow Him... Wait and be patient and see the Salvation of the Lord . The Salvation for all who believe and seek Him.

S.R. Kraniak 
www.cbctruth.com

Lets talk about our lives

Lets talk about taking our lives.

I bring this up because a neighbor of mine just hung himself. Was about 65 and just didn't want to go on. 
For those of you who have been there you know the deal. It gets old, life gets tired, the anxiety is a living Hell, people don't understand, the love life is non existent and money is almost gone.
You think of your future and you see nothing but darkness. You wonder who will really care if you were gone - you wonder if you will really find peace on the other side.

You think of many ways of doing this, they run through your head constantly. 
Driving down the road you wonder about just driving off the edge. In time it becomes an obsession that you cant get out of your head. Facing one more day is just too much to bare. Your angry, bitter and if there is a God you wish you could spit in His face.  

Night time is your best time because you know its an excuse to sleep. Oh sleep just to sleep and wake up that is was all a bad dream.  The morning comes and its the worst time for you.. It only means you have to face it all over again.

You wonder why life has to be this way. It started out OK as a child and then you wonder how you ended up so cold, empty, alone and afraid. Your tired of crying till you cant cry anymore and you don't even have the strength to shower or dress and don't even care. 
You've either gained so much weight that you cant stand yourself or you have lost so much weight that your a sick looking shadow of what you once were. 
You have tried so many medications that you wonder if your Dr really knows what he is doing.

You've read all the books, and tried all the get better fast tricks and all were a lie.

Your tired of people telling you to just snap out of it, to just smile, to be happy or those who tell you your just faking so you don't have to face the real world. Your tired of letting everyone down 

You think your the ugliest person to walk the earth and you hate everything about you. You tried drugs and drinking to hide the pain. You try cutting and self harm and they are all just a temporary fix which just leaves you back where you started. You see the scars on your body and wonder which scars are worst the ones on the outside or inside. You watch people in life who have lives, and are smiling  and their joy only makes your darkness feel worse. Taking a breath sometime takes all that you are and in that breath its as if your breathing in the pain and sorrow. The depression is actually a heavy feeling that centers around your heart and chest area. You don't ask for much - just to be happy, normal, loved, held and cared for. Is that too much to want to just be happy ? You look in the mirror and cant even believe how far you have fallen. 

You've followed every fad in order to fit in or stand out. From hair color to styles from chains leather and lust to flowers balloons and poems. Yet nothing changes and your just another day older.

For the girls you sold your bodies and souls just to simply be loved only to be lied to and abused by one guy after another. You've done things to get love that your ashamed of but if it gave you a moment of peace maybe you think it was worth it.

For you guys - you have also tried to find love but have been burnt too many times. Next thing you know your only friend is your porn and your sexual addition that brings joy for 7 minutes and then leaves you empty and feeling dirty- You have masturbated until you bled .The rush fades and your back to your empty self of pain.

So - where does that leave us ? Why am I writing this to you ? Whats my purpose ?

Well dear friend I write this to you tonight because I know that all over the world there are people just like you. You want answers and you want hope.

I know that there are people right now - Maybe you in Russia, China , USA, France, or anywhere out there just wanting someone to understand and say - Come my child I will take away the pain.
Yet you dont believe it because all your hope and trust in people is gone.

Well - There is an answer, there is hope and there is a solution and its NOT suicide !  See Suicide in not a solution but an action. It moves you from point A to point B but you really dont know what that point B is and that scares you. 

So with all of that said -
If your interested in a step by step process to break out and break free and be whole again- well let me know and follow this Blog Series that I am starting today..

So - HOLD ON and tune in.. every few days I will give you a  little bit more of the secrete and in the mean time my request from you is - HOLD ON ONE MORE DAY...

Hold on and KNOW that you can be set free. Hold on an know that someone really does love and care for you...

SR KRANIAK 

What a day in OUR life is like...LIVING THE NIGHTMARE

No one knows what its like....

Walk a mile in my shoes before you tell me to smile !

1. Waking up is like opening your eyes each morning to a world on fire. Its loud scary and sends chills down your spine. You can think or move as fear grips you on every side.
2. Cold sweats / Hot sweats , Nausea and a sick stomach . Sometimes it leads to vomiting and bathroom trips.
3. Thoughts running through your mind its like trying to catch fire flys swarming you every step you take.

Thanks just getting up..

1. Then its trying to get out of the house. but first you have to get out of the bed. The covers and pillow are your only friend and you dont want to leave them.
2. Sleep is your drug and its a sleep that never lasts long enough. You chase it like chasing the wind and its gone before you can hold onto it long enough.
3. So you talk yourself into getting up and into the shower. You look at yourself in the mirror and cant believe what you have become. You see the lifeless look in your face and eyes and remember when you were a child with joy.
4. You climb into the shower and just let the water pound you like needles running all over you soul. You dont want to leave that brief moment of fleeting pleasure but you know it must end.
5. Next its getting dressed and wondering whats the point of even looking good.. Style and dress no longer matter as you put on your clothes which are either now too big or too small. depends if you stopped eating long ago or cant stop.
6. Then comes facing that front door and the fears of what is out there- oh not monsters and danger -no they dont scare you. no its the fears of talking to people, interacting and dealing with life issues like work and driving and being in public
7. Then there is your family and friends which each day you must play the game of fake smiles and small talk. waiting for the same old questions and comments . Ones like: are you ok ? How are you feeling ? Why not try to shake it off or cheer up- you have so much to live for and your so wonderful. Why dont you just snap out of it.
8. Then there are the secret whispers you hear behind each door - Oh she or he just doesnt want to face life, they are lazy and playing us all for our sympathy. Their just playing the system so they dont have to work, they just done want to try . They are feeling sorry for themselves and want us to buy into their pity party.

And thats just the day time....

But there is a high side which we dream of...

Its coming home and getting there as fast as we can.

running to our bed and waiting for night to fall so sleep can captivate us again.

The Night is our solace and joy

And lets not forget about the days long pondering of ways to take your life.

Maybe just turning into an oncoming car or jumping into traffic.

Thought after thought of how our end would show them how real this is..

So dont tell us to snap out of it...you know not what one minute of my life is like..

Dear friends -

I know the day in the life of one dealing with Depression and Anxiety.

I know every single ugly inch of it but I also know the other side...

BEATING IT !!!

You can but not alone- 

Christ is what Christ Offers - PEACE , JOY, SAFETY, and NEW LIFE

Please call out to Him today and He will hear you...Ask Him to take control, save your soul forgive your sins ,and become Lord of all in your Life.

2 Tim 1:7  For God has not giving us the spirit of fear but of power love and a sound mind

Please check out my 2 Books

Depression anxiety and the child of GOD Pt 1 and Pt 2

Get them on Amazon

America’s suicide rate increased by 25% between 1999 and 2016 - WHY ?

America’s suicide rate increased by 25% between 1999 and 2016

THIS month, the Centres for Disease Control (CDC) released a report suggesting that America’s suicide rate increased by 25% between 1999 and 2016. The climb is from a historic low at the turn of the millennium and American suicide rates overall are still not significantly above those of other high-income countries.  Nonetheless, World Health Organisation estimates suggest that out of its 183 member countries the United States had the seventh largest percentage increase in suicide rates between 2000 and 2016. Every suicide can have multiple causes, and the CDC does not offer a simple explanation for the rise. But other research suggests that one factor behind the rising suicide rate is an erosion of the privileged status of white men.

Nearly 45,000 Americans took their own lives in 2016, and suicide is an important part of the rising number of “deaths of despair” (also including drug overdoses and liver disease) described by Anne Case and Angus Deaton, economists. These causes of death have increased the overall mortality rate amongst white men without a college degree. Both absolute levels of suicide per 100,000 people and recent increases are particularly high amongst those aged between 45 and 64. The male suicide rate remains almost four times that for women, and suicide rates for whites are higher and have been climbing faster than those for other racial and ethnic groups. 

Relative status over time appears to play a role in suicide trends. The relationship between average income and reported suicide rates across countries is weak, but inequality, recessions and unemployment are all associated with higher rates. Rising unemployment during the financial crisis was associated with increased suicide rates across Europe, for example, even while it was associated with reduced overall mortality. In America, work by Mary C. Daly and her colleagues at the Federal Reserve Bank of San Francisco suggested suicide risk rises for individuals when they see their income decline relative to the average in their county. Ms Daly has also found that richer countries in which citizens report higher average subjective well being or happiness see higher suicide rates and the same is true across America's states. Discontented people in a happy place may feel particularly harshly treated by life, they suggest. 

The link between erosion of relative status and suicide may also involve gender and race. A 35-country study by Allison Miller of Griffith University and colleagues suggested rising female labour force participation is associated with increased male suicide rates. Carol Graham and colleagues at the Brookings Institute find that controlling for factors including income, gender, marital status, education and employment, whites are considerably less optimistic, report lower life satisfaction and more worry and stress than Latinos and blacks. They also find an association between deaths of despair and these subjective wellbeing measures.  The researchers argue that one factor behind their results may be that poor whites have fallen in status in relative terms, so that they are doing worse or no better than their parents while poor minorities have still seen some progress even if they remain disadvantaged.  “The combination of fear of downward mobility, weak safety nets, and eroding social cohesion likely contributes to the high levels of desperation,” they suggest.

What can be done? The CDC suggests that a range of interventions can lower the suicide rate. These include better coverage of mental health conditions in health insurance and treatment for people at risk alongside reduced access to lethal means amongst that population—not least, guns, used in 49% of suicides. But given that more than half of suicides involve people not diagnosed with a mental health condition, the CDC suggests the need for a greater focus on “non-mental health factors further upstream” including causes of financial distress. That suggests that a strengthened safety net alongside improved insurance coverage might help both the old poor and the new hopeless cope better. 

Or what about this....THE PEACE THAT ONLY OUR CREATOR CAN GIVE IS MISSING>>>>

We have REMOVED GOD from OUR LIVES and SO REMOVED PEACE FROM OUR HEARTS

NO PEACE = NO JOY

this is FACT !

ITS TIME NOW TO COME TO CHRIST 

John 3:16

Call out to GOD , repent for our ways...except Christ as LORD

Give our hearts to Him and except His forgiveness and new life that came on the Cross and through His Blood for us and His Resurrection to a NEW LIFE 

Please CALL ON HIM NOW...

TAKE MY POLL...Lets get the ball rolling...Please help me help other

Dear friends and fellow sufferers 

Lets start a dialog -

1> What is your  greatest issue (D or A)

2> What is your worse days (M T W T F S S)

3> What is your hardest times ( AM or PM )

4> Meds or no meds 

5> How long have you been dealing with this 

6> What is your greatest help from 

7> How many of you believe in God 

8> How many have tried to take your life

9> What is a trigger for you 

10> How many think they will ever get better

If you CAN'T MAKE IT....you may be right

What do we do when we face the facts that

I can not get out of this hole ?

Well

Maybe that's the place where the answer comes

This podcast below is for those who are tired of people telling you...

Just try harder

Your not using will power

You are hiding behind your depression

If you really wanted to get out of this funk you could

well to those people

YOU CAN'T ,

but.............

Please listen to podcast below

https://app.box.com/s/wifgdrkiplca18c5n6fl24inck2ecdys

My Apology Tour TV Show...stopping world depression and anxiety for maybe a little while

Not my typical blog....

but,,,

It might just get this world from

going so bad that we all end up Depressed and Afraid..

Please click on my new Youtube TV Show

and Maybe- just maybe we

can atleast find some common ground to live without so much hate and evil..

For Just a little while longer....

If you like it...please pass it around

Maybe its a foolish idea but worth a try

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wZlBY1q5LZs&t=204s

TEEN SUICIDE OUT OF CONTROL

Teen suicide is soaring. 

…The suicide rate for white children and teens between 10 and 17 was up 70% between 2006 and 2016, the latest data analysis available from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Although black children and teens kill themselves less often than white youth do, the rate of increase was higher — 77%. A study of pediatric hospitals released last May found admissions of patients ages 5 to 17 for suicidal thoughts and actions more than doubled from 2008 to 2015.

Please check out my books on this horrible problem

Go to AMAZON and look for

Depression Anxiety and the Child of God

Pt 1 and Pt 2 The Devotional

by

Scott Kraniak 

or ask for it at your local book store

Seasonal Depression is a very real thing…

Seasonal Depression is a very real thing…

So are you suffering with depression ? Do you feel worse in the winter then the summer ? Do sunny days make you feel better and cloudy days make you feel worse ? Does the cold bring you down and warm weather make you feel better? Even wind can be a downer . If this makes your depression worse then your not alone...millions of people who are not dealing with depression feel down at these times so we can imagine how we feel in these season changes… Also suicide rates are the highest between Jan through March… If you live in parts of the world where this type of weather is common like cold and rain..well your depression is even higher.. People in Russia with the cold and long winters have very high rates of depression .. In the USA people in states like OR and WA also have very high rates of depression...some of those states because they are so rainy leave a bowl of chocolate on the kitchen table to help.. BTW dark chocolate is the best for depression ( mild) . So whats the up side as not everyone can move to a tropical Island.. well history tells us that great thinkers, writers, poets, musicians , song ,writers, painters, artist often come from cold, raining, cloud dark places..see these dark places draw out the deep inner person. Very few people are as deep in the sun as we in the dark.. So if your trapped in these dark seasonal places...well write a poem, a book, a song, pain, get into art work. Counsel people for only ones who know these dark places can help others in the same dark places.

From the ashes of disaster grow the roses of success and though the rain and storm clouds are in your life today… the sun ALWAYS rises. I pray that not only the Sun shines on you but that the Son lives in you. He gives light in the heart even when there is no sun in the sky…

S.R.K.

March 11^th 2018

1. NOTE – take plenty of Vitamin D...it is whats in the sun that makes us feel up...

Here is my BLOG...have you read them all ?

If you are new to my Blog or if you have checked it out before.....

Remember there are years worth of notes, lessons, studies and insights you may have missed

please scroll through the whole Blog and make sure you have read them all..

Please pass this Blog along also...

depression anxiety cutting and suicidal thoughts don't have to be how you live..

there ARE answers and NEW LIFE